Winning The Online Popularity Contest

“i'm awsome!!!
no you're not dude don't lie
i'm awsome!!!
i'm drivin around in my mom's ride
i'm awsome!!!
a quarter of my life gone by and
i met all my friends online
i'm awsome!!!
i will run away from a brawl
i'm awsome!!!
there's no voice mail nobody called
i'm awsome!!!
i can't afford to buy eight ball
and i talk to myself
on my facebook wall”

Excerpt from song “I’m Awesome,” by Spose

            I had an interesting conversation with someone recently, who boasted on more than one occasion, that he had over 5,000 friends on Myspace. His next goal, he said, was to gain a similar number on Facebook.  I asked, “Do you know all of those Myspace friends personally?” Of course, I already knew the answer as soon as he received a cell phone text alert from Lady Gaga’s fan page. “Well, they are in my friend’s list,” he said. His next cell phone trick was to call his mom and tell her when he would be home. He is 40 years old – enough said.

            Wow, I am feeling a little inadequate here. As a writer, I do have both Myspace and Facebook pages. I even have a Twitter account, as a matter of fact. I will admit, however, that my current combined total of friends and followers falls short of the 5,000 so easily obtained by the social media guru I spoke of. I also have a couple of blogs, and have a LinkedIn account, as well as a large list of other platforms.

            If I may date myself a little, I recall the very early days of Facebook. If my memory serves me correctly, it was around 2004. Yes, I was one of the first to sign up. It was a different platform then, what I would call a simple business networking or social resume site. It was dull but functional. I was dull but functional. Back then, my friend list consisted of fellow co-workers from my corporate grind job and others just like me, all working to put our name out there in our chosen profession. Looking back, it is quite funny for me.

            At some point, much like what eventually happened with Myspace, non-professionals joined, followed by a younger generation. Soon after, the network marketers arrived. Oh and shall I dare say spammers? You’re right, I am being too harsh. What I meant to say, is the friendly folks who can show me how to make $7000 dollars a month from my couch and the nice financier sending me a link to claim my lottery winnings from Ethiopia. I almost forgot a group, the Farmville farmers and Mafia Wars mobsters. I’ll stop there.

            Do not get me wrong, I still use Facebook, Myspace and Twitter. My life has changed and likewise, my profiles have changed. I have even “unfriended” certain people. And as a writer, I understand the power of social networking platforms. In fact, they can be beneficial to any business or professional. I am not knocking housewives that use them either.  If you enjoy Farmville or Mafia Wars, by all means, knock yourself out. For me, I will stick to actual friends and associates that I actively engage in some kind of dialogue with, or groups I am really interested and involved in. You are probably right, in thinking my friends list may grow more slowly, or simply remain tiny in comparison to others. I am reminded of what the lady of the evening told the anxious, young sailor. “It ain’t how much you got honey - it’s what you do with what you got.”